Friends Zone
by Ruin Takada
Summary: A procrastination fic: Jacob is dumped in the Friends Zone. Humourous  I hope  short, may possibly be extended. One-sided JakexBella. First Twilight Fic, so be constructive!


**A/N: Hey, this is Ruin Takada here. Just thought I'd have a little go at a Twilight short, just to say I did. To be honest, I got this idea from watching the Ryan Reynolds movie, "Just Friends", which really is a hoot. Anyways, this is my first Twilight fanfiction so don't kill me if it's not as good as you'd wanted, okay? PM me for that, if you want. If you want quality, then read my other fics, particularly the Death note ones, if you know that fandom. Really, this is just a writing exercise brought on by a lack of updating anything else.**

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Friends Zone

Part I

Ever since Bella had come to me, asking me to help her fix those bikes, I had been happy, well up to taking part in any excuse to hang out with her, and even more glad that it'd been her who'd made the first move, and not either of our dads – her dad was police chief Swan, after all, and I knew that, if I'd ever had the heart – no, the balls - to go against any of that man's wishes, I'd probably end up with a cap or two in a very warm part of my anatomy.

And that would put a very big crimp in my plan to tear off all five limbs of the Cullen guy for hurting Bella – if he ever had the guts to come back, that is.

From the first day that we'd started fixing the rolling death traps, life had been very

good and very simple. I, the master greaser, would kneel down by a bike and start

putting it back together, stealing glances of Bella every time she wasn't looking, while the girl in question would sit on the garage stool, hand me tools every now and again and order pizza to come straight out back for us whenever we got hungry. It wasn't really helping, per se, but it was certainly helpful, what she provided, and I wouldn't say anything wrong about it.

Not to her face, anyways.

And so, it was on one typically rainy day in La Push that the dolt twins had come over. Quil and Embry, the boys of which you could associate a thousand words, and none of them complimentary. Anyway, they came over, and for the first time in a few weeks there was more than one guy in the place – way too many for my liking, I can tell you.

"Hey, Jake," said Quil, "what'cha doin' in here?"

"What do you think it looks like?" offered Embry, punching him lightly on the shoulder, "he's all alone in a garage with a Rabbit and a double-X!" Quil laughed, and Embry turned to look at Bella, who looked a cross between confused and peeved. "Oh, hey by the way." He offered, waving in her direction. She waved back half-heartedly, probably not sure whether or not their status as my friends meant anything.

"So?" asked Quil, quitting his laughter, "who's the unlucky girl?" I had half a mind to give him a do-over at that, but that'd make me look bad in front of Bella, so I introduced her instead.

"Oh, this is Bella. She's cool."

"Ooh, Bella!" Embry crowed, grinning like the dolt he was, "Doesn't that make her the chief's daughter?"

"Is that a bad thing?" she asked, "Aren't Billy and Charlie friends, right?"

"Oh, it's not a bad thing. Not for you, anyways." He turned to me, putting on a stupid mock whisper, "Won't the chief take your left nut if he finds out you're doing her in the back of the Rabbit?" Quil burst out laughing, holding himself there as though he could feel it already, and to be honest, I was inclined to agree.

"Oh, er," Bella offered, standing up, "Jake and I aren't going out."

"You're not?" Quil and Embry chorused, as though this was all new.

"We're not. No, we're_ just friends_." At the mention of those words, I felt something snap in half inside me, like a rib, or the feeling you get when you eat far too much Mexican food. No, that wasn't good, not in the slightest.

"Ohhh, looks like you've just gotten dumped!" Embry crowed. He turned back to Bella "Is he really that bad on the car seat?"

"That's it!" I yelled, and he and I were soon taking a tumble on the dry ground of the garage, me aiming to rip him limb from limb, him trying to keep them.

_MySpace_

_Master_Greaser_

_Dear Diary. Today, my heart was torn from my chest. Today, I finally know what it's like to die – or at least wish for it. Today, I was rejected by the only girl I've every loved in the entirety of my existence in front of my friends, and dumped in the Friends Zone!_

_/You have _ comments._

_Dorito_King says: Oooh, burn!_

_Kim_Lovah says: Double Burn!_

_Boo_Boo says: Burns Unit!_

_Col-lin says: Mustang Ward, bed 4, next to the old guy who forgot how to use the kettle!_

_Master_Greaser says: Dude, not cool. I pour out my soul and you're stamping all over it! Anyways, what's with the anime reference?_

_Col-lin says: Vampire Girl let me borrow her collection. Dude, do you no nothing! _

_S_Uley says: There're right: that is pretty harsh. You really need to get yourself a girlfriend. Or at least someone who isn't a 2D PC creation. _

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**A/N: So, any thoughts? Was it actually a good giggle, or was it really as bad as I told you it could be. If you were warned that it was going to be bad, and this fear was confirmed, what the hell made you want to go ahead and do so anyways? Like I said, if you know any of the fandoms I cover in my other fics, go ahead and read them, and if you know Death Note, go ahead and vote on my current poll (you'll have to look through my profile for it, though). **

**Yes: Dorito_King is Paul, Kim_Lovah is Jared, Boo_Boo is Seth, and Col-lin is Collin (sorry, imagination has a minor breakdown). We all know who S_Uley is, anyways. As for the anime reference, it was a reference to the anime Fullmetal Alchemist (Hagane no Renkinjutsushi, in Japan). Find out more on Wikipedia, or just watch it, if you don't know anything about the anime. **

**So, thanks for reading my first Twilight fanfiction, and please stick around for anything else I do (I've got a load of Death Note projects lined up, as explained in the poll – this was, after all, a procrastination fic). **

**Thanks again, and please R&R,**

**Ruin Takada**


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